Torn

I am very pissed off, hopefully in three hours I'll be lurking at the back of The MacBeth, drinking as quickly as possible, watching bands, trying to talk to friends and thinking of ways to destroy people using the power of the internet, and everything will be okay, but right now I am really pissed off with this Nike+ thing.

OfficialNike is following me on twitter, so he might well read this and endevour to get in touch and send me thousands of pounds and goodies and sports gear in compensation.

It took hours to get the thing connected to my ipod and calibrated last night. I was running the streets til midnight, pausing to jab at the various setup things until it started working. But I finally got it calibrated.

And today I set out to Regents Park to actually use it as intended.

But FUCKING CUNTING SHITTING BASDARDOS MURDER SWIMINBLOOD RAPE ASSJOCKEY, its crashed my ipod.

I'm didn't think it was possible to crash ipods, there's no reset button, if its crashed its fucked.

But no, its crashed, its locked, the buttons don't do anything, the lock slidery switch thing does nothing, pulling the headphones out doesn't do anything, disconnecting the nike+ dongle and reconnecting it does nothing, syncing it on my computer does nothing, itunes doesn't see it. My ipod is fucked.

The display, it still works, the top level menu has nike+ipod highlighted, but thats it. No control.

No scroll wheel action, no selecting things action nothing.

I was one of these asshole you see when you're out jogging, one of these assholes who is all dressed up for exercise, but instead walking about jabbing at their ipod. That was me today.

JESUS CHRIST, in the time I've taken to write this, itunes is still fucked, the ipod still doing nothing.

and my head hurts so much. Its pounding, pounding.

I think I want to kill as many nike/apple employees as possible, or just get them booted out of their jobs.

I've got to do something.

Its the only thing I have left.

Ooh ooh, I did see Gruey when I was in Regents Park, and he's one of very few actors who have been shown ejaculating in a mainstream, UK produced feature.