New drawings

First new drawing up on Naked Chicks on Post-it Notes in about three months, Not Safe For Work aye here

3D Post-It Maze

This one was buzzing through my head for a while I guess, its like the embodiment of the limitless possibilities of post-it notes, how you can get lost drawing on them, lose yourself, lose yourself.

Inspi

Incredibly frustrated by this netbook now, I thought that I could just install loads of neat and useful software to my Acer Aspire One wot I bought the other week as a replacement for my regular laptop when it died.

But alas, its not so simple.

I wanna do a really neat post-it note animation, I've been having 3D Monster Chase dreams it was this Doom-like game for the Amstrad CPC 464 twenty-five years ago, and my boredom tolerance has reached the point where I could draw the maze and animate running around it, but alas, my scanner doesnae work with this operating system, and besides I have no animation software or out that can stitch jpgs into mpgs.

I've got half a dozen songs in ma heid which I need to record and sling up, but there's no pre-loaded software to do it and I can't find owt that works with this variety of Linux. There's mic socket on the side, but thats no use, and the built in mic only seems to work for the webcam. Christ, it lets you record video from the webcam, but its impossible to do anything with the video.

I was talking to some musicy chap last night about the various music scenes and promoters around London, and after my mind boggled for a while I figured it would be neat to do some kind of hookup network diagram, linking bands to promoters, but its not to be with this OS.

Its been ages since I did any ill theatre drawings, my graphics tablet doesn't have drivers for this machine, and I can't just draw stuff on paper and scan it. I guess I could draw with biro, then take a photie then dick around with the gimp, but thats just too convoluted.

Playing MP3s is a bitch, the pre-loaded MP3 player is an ass, it takes forever to look at my removeable hard disc cos there's a few thousand more files than it can handle. I installed VLC which is some kind of free media player, but from the Acer website it appears to not have any codecs loaded, so its no good to anyone. What was the name of that open source media player, Songbird?

There's not IRC client easily available. I fear I may never enter the Bowlie chatroom again, my friends there long gone, lost into the ether. Truly this is the time Bowlie finally died.

Oh, and fucking hell, I have no CD burning facilities no more.

What happened? When did computers suddenly stop working? Its like we're back to 1993 technology where you never know if whatever you've bought, or downloaded is going to work, and you have to scrabble around for days trying to plug everything together and set ever thing up.

I have less than no money, can some PC company send me a computer that works, I promise I'll sing its praises from all of my websites and everything I can use it to create.

**UPDATE**
Oh and fucking hellski, I can't even watch The IT Crowd on Channel 4's catch up service cos it only supports Windows PCs. It's kind of like both of my legs and one of my arms have been tied behind my back and three of the fingers on my remaining hand are taped together, and my eyes, like I'm wearing some steampunk Cyberdog glasses with horns coming out.

pronscene

Well ladies, I'm pretty sure you won't be quite as impressed or surprised by this as I am.

But my post-it pics are on a porn website, one of the big faceless corporate spammish porn websites of the might world-wide web. Whilst usually they pick the usual photies from the great world of porn, beautiful women, naked and writhing, tits out and playing with their flanges.

But halfway down the page, in amongst the photies of flesh is a flash of yellow and a scratch of biro, something I have manufactured.

I have displaced porn with art.

Ladies, don't all thank me at once.

Nuddy chick news

Crikey, over on Alison Tyler's blog Trollop with a Laptop, she's been running short sex story writing contest, where you can win one of my post-it notes. The entries are all in and folk are voting for their favourite today.

Have a look here

#3 strikes a chord with me and #6 is really nice and erotic, #9 is strangely terrifying and #11 is kind of like a Timothy Lea Confessions of a nude artist scene.

What do you think?

Competition time

This is rather cool

Over on Trollop with a laptop, Alison Tyler, the porn writer, is having a competition to write a short erotic piece to accompany the pic on the site.

Enter and you could win one of my pictures.

Regulators

Aw man, I think I've set me a new record today, or more accurately you've set me a new record, for today so far, according to statcounter, every single person who's read this blog is a regular visitor.

I love you guys, its like I exist only for you. I want you to know that.

We've got the entire British Isles covered, from Glasgow to London, via Nottingham, and we've got reps from the great superpowers of Russia and the US of A. When you read this just think of those guys reading it next to you. Its like a big old anonymous and faceless family.

Ooh, while you're here, over on the nuddy chicks site its International Mention this Website on a Messageboard Day, there's a special post-it note and everything. So feel free to spread a little porn in those places where folk haven't yet sampled the NSFW delights of naked women badly sketched on stolen office stationary.

A Day in the Life

That Bowlie mem thing where you take photies of your day. This is the first time in five years that I've actually been able to participate in it on the site.

Quite possibly the most thrilling day I've had in months, action-packed some would say. Finishing up surrrounded by red hot naked chicks.

Revie

Oh god, I've been reviewed


Its all quite positive, not sure if its accurate. Mum's going to be so proud. Kind of puts pay to me writing any ex-girlfriend/fuck buddy-based erotic literature tonight. Instead I'm going to take a cold shower and try to stop sobbing.

Oh god, what have I done.

How did it all end up like this?

Damn you MacGuffin!

Things and stuff

Wee a slightly unnatural yellow colour, and pain in my stomache where I think my liver or kidneys are. It could just all be in my head.

Got a mention on Sparky's Magic Piano's Facebook

One handed origami video that I haven't posted here before:-


Plimptons gig on the seventh, expect more spam closer to the time

The one thats shameless, shameless

Went to London Bloggers Meetup.

Arrived on my own without usual meetup companion Aref-Adib and as a result sat on my own in a corner for the first half hour or so, scribbling notes about the sponsored goodie bag.

Berocca make vitamin drinks and engery tablets, the goodie bag contain a fine branded glass (about 400ml), one branded biro, a tube of the Berocca effervescent tablets (orange flavour) and a pad of branded post-it notes.

I'm sceptical about the effervescent tablets, one side of the pack says "Taking more than your recommended daily intake may be harmful", the other side of the pack says each tablet contains 860% of your recommended daily allowance of some of the vitamins.

It is a fine branded glass they provide and the branded post-it notes make my mind boggle at the possibilities. But the warnings and information on the packaging are a bit ambiguous. Its like if a pack of razor blades says how sharp the blades are and then warns you against cutting yourself.

Anyhoo, Jaz and Lisa both recommended taking the stuff, so I have done. The fizzy bubbly goodness has burnt my lip, but I think the goodness will do as a surrogate breakfast for me tomorrow morning. It is orange flavour so I think it counts as one of my five daily portions (along with two cups of coffee, bacon roll and microwave meal).

I am well healthy me.

Met the following bloggers:-

Andy from the marketing blagger
Chris from qwghlm
Andy from Distributed Research
Jure from Zemanta
Lisa from u-handbag
Krista from Londelicious
Julius he's an event manager
Jaz from ShinyRed
Tom the Flashboy from The Metro

Also I think I glanced at:-

Carmen from Green is Not a Colour
Annie from the Going Underground
Peter Marshall from My London Diary

Mouth

Still in agony, woke up twice last night in pain after turning on the wrong side.

Work is okay, but i did get overcome with emotion and had to go and cry in a quiet corner after we managed to get some stuff done on time.

Over on Facebook, Rosie reckons if I change my profile picture I won't remain single for much longer, suggesting first I use a photo of me and my niece, and then an arty black and white one of me playing guitar.

Four hours later and it hasn't had any effect on my singularity, but I do become sad reading facebook.

Over on the nuddy chicks site, after the phenomenal success of my first venture, I'm looking around at work to find a post-it pad to do a quick "YOUR ADVERT HERE $2/week" image of the side column. If you know of anyone who'd want to advertise their wares to around 14,000 people all over the world every week, email me.

Went out last night to meet Rowan and Mark and go on the London Eye, the damned thing closes at 8pm at this time of year so we went to a pub, watched the football and I drank that Fruli's strawberry beer. Its like CAMRA alcopop.

Success and agony

eeep, With google adsense abandoning me when I was barely up to $60, they only pay out at $100 intervals, so I had to seek other sources of revenue. By selling ad space directly to the selling folk, I can make $1/week, or if I up my prices who knows. Got the first payment yesterday. Skipping round my room think who I could spend the naked chick millions on.

Injured cheek is getting annoying. Depending on which side I lie on when I'm in bed, woke up in howling agony several times. Face is now hideously disfigured and my speech has been affected, sounds like I'm trying to chaw a whole pack of gum when I talk.

Sleep also disrupted by early morning text messages, but hey ho, I guess it comes with the territory of being the sort of person folk call in times of need and loneliness.

Still craving company and afflicted by crippling loneliness. Possibly going on the London Eye this evening with Rowan Just Joan and boyf. Would prefer warm hug and someone to tell me that beans on toast ought not be the best meal of yer week.

Highs and Lows of 2007

Highlights of the year 2007 include, rather neatly occasions where there is video footage.

Like the final Deep Fried Wolfknuckles gig at the 13th Note. The covers of You're in a Bad Way, You're like Manchester, and 100,000 Fireflies, tears streaming down my face nd blood pumping out of my finger.




Also the Plimptons invasion of Liverpool for the International Pop Overthrow Festival
The spectacular success of the nekkit chicks website is also an ongoing highligh.

Low points include

That hellish weekend where I both lost my job wih Linn, the girl thing exploding, after drinking all day with Robbie and Colin, necking a bottle of vodka, sleeping for an hour then driving to a Loves gig in London. It still mkes me want to kill myself, and I think has contributed to the bitter and evil man you see before you now. It helps me to feel justified when I'm being a cruel vindictive asshole
In sunny moments I forget and wonder what if... but then it comes back, I bare my teeth and do stuff. Kind of like a little battery of anti-matter.

Hopes for 2008

Something to kind of cancel out the low points of '07, raising my faith in humanity, or possibly just lording over them like dogs.
Oh and buying a sodding house

Cleansheet

Crikey, they've started to use my drawings over on Clean Sheets magazine here. Not really something I can read in the office with other folk around, wait until I get home.

Warm fuzzy feelings of success and achievement.

Post-It Note animation playlist

Three knockbacks on my mobile phone and I've done nothing all day