Showing posts with label invokation. Show all posts
Showing posts with label invokation. Show all posts

Tuesday, 16 November 2010

Am I Spartacus?

At the weekend there, in the aftermath of Paul Chambers losing his appeal on the #twitterjoke this, there was a great outpouring of something on Twitter, thousands of people retweeting his original 'menacing' tweet about blowing up Nottingham's Robin Hood airport. It was a great show of solidarity.

But something bugged me, there was something that didn't feel right about tweeting
Crap! Robin Hood airport is closed. You've got a week to get your shit together, otherwise I'm blowing the airport sky high!! #IAmSpartacus
Its that bit at the end, appending the hashtag. Its incorrect, just as incorrect as getting the 'may be a joke twibbon'. Its a disclaimer and that's wrong. Twitter shouldn't need such things, the context is inherent to the medium.

Its like if in the original Spartacus scene, the folk joining in stood up and said "I'm Spartacus! Just kidding, I'm not really, you were right the first time". It agrees with the original charge.

If the sentiment you want to express is solidarity then don't undermine it by joking.

The show of solidarity would have been more profound without the #iamspartacus hashtag, and with a wider range of targets being menaced. "I've left a suitcase of explosives in Victoria Station, you have 28 minutes to find it", "A plane will crash in the next seven hours", "I just pushed a man under a train", etc, purposefully tying up so much of the security services' time in investigating 'menacing' messages on twitter, that the authorities would have no choice but to admit they were wrong, that the twitter medium is not to be taken seriously.

I had this similar idea a few months back, the NATO phonetic alphabet thing, Foxtrot, Bravo, November, etc, to do a similar alphabet using terrorist keywords. So, if any authorities are monitoring voice phonecalls, they'd be snowed under with assassinations, bombs, capture, hijackings and so on.

Monday, 29 December 2008

Scenester Scene #1

I'm been wondering about how to map the music scene for a while now, its been lurking at the back of my head for month, only bubbling to the forefront on talking to muso-types. But it finally formed a shape in ma heid last night, driving home in a flu-conceived delerium.

The invocation of Venn

Any band can get their own gig, but its the promoters who make the scene, promoters putting on bands who've already passed the hurdle of convincing another person to put them on. 'Music scene' is very subjective, but for me it means the gigs I go to. For someone else its means the gigs they go to. Back in Glasgow it would be The Winchester Club, Drive Carefully Records and Pin Up Nights, but here in London I habitually go to Twee As Fuck and Lost Music, with occasional ventures to White Heat, Goonite, HDIF and a few others.

These promoters are pretty good a picking bands that I enjoy seeing, and occasionally different promoters have the same bands playing, its like a stamp of quality for the bands.

By my reckoning Twee As Fuck have had 60 different bands playing and Lost Music have had 72, the two overlapping by 12 bands.

scene01

Bands who've played both Twee As Fuck and Lost Music (12 of them)
Hong Kong in the 60s
Little My
Mexican Kids At Home
Mono Taxi
Pocketbooks
St Christopher
Stars of Aviation
Still Corners
The Hermit Crabs
The Just Joans
The Pains of being pure at heart
The School

Bands who've played Twee As Fuck and not Lost Music (48 of them)
A Classic Education
A Smile and A Ribbon
Afternoon Naps
Bears
Bearsuit
Betty and the Werewolves
Bricolage
Comet Gain
Connan and Moccasins
Esiotrot
Fanfarlo
Hands on Heads
Hatcham Social
Hotpants Romance
Iguana Nights
Ipso Facto
Je Suis Animal
King and the Olive Fields
Liestenstein
Lis-Bonne
Little Things
Love is all
Monade
My Sad Captains
Peter Parker
Sexy Kids
Shragg
Strange Idols
The Bobby McGees
The Bridal Shop
The Chiara Ls
The Crisps
The Duloks
The Felt Tips
The Inconsolables
The Mai 68s
The Mare
The Margarets
The Noughts and Crosses Band
The Voluntary Butler Scheme
The Wave Pictures
The Winter Club
Theoretical Girl
Tom Hatred and the Angry Band
Vic Godard and Subway Sect
Wake the President
Would-be-goods
Zoey Van Goey

Bands who've played Lost Music and not Twee As Fuck (60 of them)
Air Formation
Autocolt
Champion Kickboxer
Charlie Don't Surf
Daniel Benjamin
Downdime
Dyrain
Falling out of cars
Havana Guns
Horowitz
Indurain
Irene
Jesus Licks
Model Morning
Molloy
Mr Solo
Nat Johnson
Navvy
Pete Green
Phil Wilson
Plans and Apologies
Radio Luxembourg
Santa Dog
Sarandon
Secret Shine
Silver Springs
Slow Down Tallahassee
Smokers Die Younger
Sparkys Magic Piano
Strawberry Story
Swimsuit Issue
Tall Poppies
The All New Adventures of Us
The Argonauts
The Arndales
The Candy Twins
The Cut Outs
The Darlings
The Delanies
The Electric Pop Group
The Fischers
The Gresham Flyers
The Hillfields
The J-Pegs
The Keith John Adams
The Kick Inside
The Lieutenants Mistress
The Lodger
The Loves
The Manhattan Love Suicides
The Night Jars
The Postcards
The Puncture Repair Kit
The Sailplanes
The Scaremongers
The Social Services
The Trudy
The Understudies
Their Hearts were full of Spring
Time. Space. Repeat

You can view all the raw(ish) data here on Googledocs
Well, this wee data analysis has been fun and informative, I'm sure you'll agree. Hasn't really helped me on the job front, and now this flu has my eyes streaming as well as my nose. There's no hope for me.

Other promotions I need to parse in the future
Fortuna Pop (done)
Spiral Scratch (done)
Offbeat
HDIF
Guided Missile
White Heat

If there's any bands I've missed or promoters I've forgotten, let me know. I see this one rolling and rolling

Sunday, 28 September 2008

TheESSEX

Where is Wickford?
Where is Shenfield?

What do these places mean? What should they mean to me?

There's engineering work on the trainlines so I have to get a replacement bus on my way east to visit the niece, my brother and sister-in-law. Its a warm day, you are my indian summer, maybe the last of the year, the citizens of Wickford and Shenfield are out with their friend nd loved ones, drinking and holding. I am on buses and trains on my own, scribbling.

It didn't have to be this way.

Months ago I bought a new mobile phone, a Sony Ericsson K800i, with the intention of being able to send emails and update my various blogs whilst out and about

Those bastards at CarPhone Warehouse sold me a pudding. Battery life is down to 8 hours now, thats with using it for one phone call and two text messages a week, the memory is too small to surf the web and email is impossible to set up. The wee cover of the camera is badly designed, it keeps sliding open in my pocket and taking photies of my shrapnel. How can something be designed and sold so bad?

Those bastards.

Also my own fault for not taking it back to the shop.

CarPhone Warehouse = bunch of cunts

Sony Ericsson K800i = shittest phone ever

...

A girl sits next to me on the bus, lack of empty seats. She's tall, in her early 20s, blonde hair and kind of stocky. I think I'm in love with her.

Pale skin, small delicate hands, she keeps adjusting her top so it covers the way her tummy bulges over the sides of her jeans.

My mind keeps drifting to wrapping my arms round her, her body soft under my fingers, kissing her neck.

I wonder what she smells like.

Crikey I need a girlfriend.

...

Back to reading this book, The17. Bill, the narrator, has just moved to east London in it.

At exactly the same I was driving to south London from Glasgow.

What went wrong?

Saturday, 5 July 2008

A Day in the Life

A Day in the Life 03
That Bowlie mem thing where you take photies of your day. This is the first time in five years that I've actually been able to participate in it on the site.

Quite possibly the most thrilling day I've had in months, action-packed some would say. Finishing up surrrounded by red hot naked chicks.

Tuesday, 3 June 2008

Rain rain go away

I don't know about you, but am thrilled to have gone up another two Technorati authority points. I blame London blogger Krista and Shanna from Year of the Books

Ooh, I could be on TV tonight, on The Culture Show, where Trev got me interviewed. I, for one, am filled with terror and anticipation. If a successful career as a talking head on the more sophisticated of the BBC's output doesn't get me the girl, I don't know what will.

Still no idea who these people reading my blog are, but they're getting a tad obsessive, may I recommend using a RSS feed reader, rather than actually visiting the site several times a day. Try this feed and this feed. Or try asking me to come over for a coffee and to watch Dr Who.

Monday, 10 December 2007

Happy Birthday (Judo not required)

Blog temporarily made private over the weekend cos Andy Hart found it offensive and was being a dick as always. I had not enough time and inclination to sort it. But now I have.

Photies from Glasgow
here

Report from the weekend in Glasgow below...


Friday - 19:23
I sit, at long last, on the plane,
my fate in the hands of a pilot. I am
helpless.

Not quite enough time in the airport to
buy snacks, too much queuing for security, foreign
folk needing to queue jump to avoid missing their
flight. At the check in desk, so paracitic
credit card chugger. I script in my head what
I'd say, I'd ask if he has a credit card,
one of those, and does he pay it in full
every month. Does the 16% APR look set
to be reduced in line with interest rates and isn't
10.5% profit a bit steep?

The bus dropped us off, leading to
a frantic dash to the check in desk, this
immaculately designed building raped with security
barriers, they look temporary, in that way
that things do after they've been in place for
fice years.

Was running late to get out of work,
firing of a final salvo to Anorak. Why
is it always antagonistic and confrontational
Is it me? No, cos even when I'm not
there Tasty fires salvos, even when I don't
mention stuff, Tasty brings things up.
Maybe he has never stopped loving me.

It ain't healthy, this running through
my head.

"It might help if you asked The
Plimptons to write some good songs" quoth he.

"If they did, would you listen?" Untyped.



The chap sat next to me is getting
frustrated. "Fuck" he says,. The plane isn't due
to leave for another five minutes.

The stewardess with the mic is amusing.
Two lost passengers, are we sure we're
not them? Are we sure we're going to
Glasgow?

Friday - 21:37
The venue isn't open yet, The Beat Club
375 Sauchiehall Street, so I head to ra
Noodle Bar for ma dinner.

Somewhere behind me and to the left a
chap from my first year at university is having
food with his friends.

Since I stepped off the airport bus,
Central Station stop, I've been filled with
glee, I'm home and dry. The streets warm and
embracing, familiar and safe.

This one time I ate in here before a
Belle & Seb gig at the ABC, there was a
crowd of ten or so of us, bickering over eating in
or take away.

Saturday - 00:47
The Beat Club is dark and neon lit when I wander
in, through the murk I see Paul Smith
of Pin Up, and thence emerges Martin Smith
and in the distance Adam, friends. I spot
five or six people, Plimps and entourage. On
stage are some noisy shoegaze Oasis kids. If
they weren't too young I'd figure they were taking
the piss.

Text message from Robbie, he's round the
corner at The State, and seconds later, I'm there
too. Finton Stack, and a chap called Anders, the
name's a little familiar, but I've never seen
him before in my life.

The chaps are there sampling beers
uninterested in joining me at the Plimptons gig
probably awaiting the new album rather than
internecine gigging.

We chat, time passes and I return to
Pin Up Nights.

It was years ago, 1999 when I
first met John D McGonagle, one of the
founders of the Pin Up Nights franchise, him and a chap
called Graham. We'd been competing against
each other in the elections to be student
president at Strathclyde.

I didn't see John D at the gig, thing
slowly fall apart I guess.

Excitement buids before the Plimps take
to the stage. I recognise folk in the
crowd, the smiley foreign lass from
Sounds of Sweden, Chris, Dave and
Katie from the Just Joans, ancient
scenesters from long ago.

The place explodes when the Plimps
take to the stage.

They have the new album in their
minds, still raw, not recorded. The
band all psyched, Rowan smiling eyes
asparkle, Martin overcome by crazed animal spirits,
Cal the youngester fitting in neatly to the six-piece,
Adam twitching by the mic, on home turf, Neil
back to the audience sorting out levels on his
bass, Paul - eyeliner.

Whilst there are still the regular old favourites in the
set, Could I Be Loved and John Major, they
take the opportunity of a full band to play the
more complicated stuff from their 2004 debut
album and earlier demos, The Plimptons Rap
even gets an airing.

Tracks from the third album include Lonely
Old Man, who's MySpace references could date quickly
and Virgin on the Ridiculous, which sounds
terrifyingly like Elvis Costello, Paul Kelly's influence
in the song writing.

Most terrifying of the evening are the
people dancing, looks of glee on the audience's
faces isn't enough, there are mobs of
complete strangers dancing in front of the
stage, folk coming up and shaking Adam's
hand after the show.

What have they
gained since I left?

Text message from the girl, she's just
finished work, Robbie, Finton, and Anders
are there so I head off.

---

The next day, the weather's shite
as we head off to the farmer's market in
Partick, on a quest for duck eggs and
homemade sorbet.

Some further acquaintance from uni is
running one of the stalls, selling porridge oats,
my eyes glaze over as I try to recall
how I know him, but the moment passes.

Robbie and Finto are there,
four of us head to a bearby Polish Deli
for pickles and kabanos. In Glasgow its
still a novelty instead of the norm.

The weather's still crap as we sit
in The Three Judges. I leave myself at
the combined mercy of the others' expert
knowledge of fine beers and ales.

The rain is torrential with blobs of
snows, the girl's feet soaked, when we
call round at my old flat to pick up
mail. A good carrier bag full for
me to wade through an hour later at
the Bon Accord as we're served a
succession of Bloody Mary derived drinks.
The one with floaty nits of horseradish
is unexpectedly
pleasant, but
would be a
task to persuade
others to sample.

An indian
takeaway, the
film Chopper
with Eric
Bana and NCiIS
on the TV.

Its dark and wet out when we
stagger into The Cellers. Used to be the
Brunswick Cellers back in my day, now its still
cold and gloomy but utterly without soul.
Flatmate Alan and his wife Claire are here
for my birthday. They haven't seen us since
the wedding, two months ago, they
bring gifts. I melt in a gooey mess of
happiness, leaving Natalie and Alan to
do the talking. The Wolfknuckles soldier on,
Iain Thornton is still around, no one's
seen Teamie in months, the old club nights
are achanging, naked woman on fliers.
Bis still playing gigs. Working over
Christmas. Teamie appears, the
descent of the Winchester, change, change,
change.

Drinks are drunk and baby its time to
move on.

The weather's still crap as me and
Natalie find The Flying Duck, the entrance
is hidden, but inside its homely. We
strangely see Bis's Sci-Fi Steve fluttering
down the corridors like the fifth Doctor,
before we pay in and retrouve Robbie and
Finto.

The latest version of that crowd is here,
faces missing, far away, unexpected face
now here, like Big Duncan and Wake The
President, last see in London just days
before.

Robbie dragging me to the dancefloor for the Rutles.
Nat dragging me to the dancefloor for some other dancing
Me dragging Robbie to the dancefloor via Gav for Hectors
Natalie taking photies of the boys, looking cool
Fear / jealousy of Natalie and Finto chatting and flicking through my camera, then remembering faith and the phrase 'true blue'
Flashes of years gone by, similar folk dancing similarly
Somethings change, but not everything
Text message from the ex-wife, she'd just finished work and wanted to know where we were, battery on my phone failed before I could reply.
For a few seconds I thought it could be awkward were she with us.
Robbie mentioning some sad news about an ex- in London. Feelings of helpnessness "But I should do something"
More booze, more dancing.
Trying to get Ally to play Pipettes.
Trying to get Ally to put on more bands at the Winchester
Replying to Colin's post on Anorak offline.
Switching on lamps and eating cashew nuts, pilferred from the night before.
Dancing to Stone Roses.
Smiling at Finto and Nat dancing to Pulp. Did I really drag him out to the Winchester?

Did I have fun, damned right, didn't
even have to apply Mental Judo.

Next morning we stagger to the
bus station. A man dies of a heart attack
in Waterstones. I step onto the Megabus
and vanish.

Friday, 31 August 2007

Gah, with the lack of evidence to the contrary, I'm guessing Rachel grassed me up to Kitchen, which serves me right I guess to trying to over compensate for paranoia and changing my policy towards her, last time I bloody offer any help.

Well, the road's getting slippery up ahead and I've got next to no idea where I'm going, but I'm going to have to change gear and shrug off some commitments.

In other news, my flatmate/landlord tells me they're having some kind of party and a week or so, the same time that Glasgow's coming down to visit, which should be nice and help me break the ice here.

Ooh, another familar band from north of the border playing tonight at the Bull and Gate.

Monday, 20 August 2007

The Deathly Hallows

Frere gave me a few books, the Genesis of Shanara and the final Harry Potter book. I'd just started reading Kafka's The Trial, but I think I'll skip it and plough through Potter. Admittedly I've skipped a few books in the series, but after seeing the last film with Glasgow, I think I'll have to finish what I've started.

Ladies toilet - Nice n Sleazys

On the internet front, one of those website picked up mine so I've been getting thousands of hits gain, I've got to keep creating content and not drop the ball like I did last time. Should get picked up by another in a day or so, and so it rolls on, I think the threshold for word of mouth to kick in is around 20,000 hits.

Hibbett and Pete Green gigs this week, I'm trying to take Fiona and Dom along to expand their indie horizons. Trying to figure when I can next venture to Glasgow, was hoping to get there to see Astrid, but looks like I'll miss that. ooh, still haven't found out if I get September bank holidayness.

And elsewhere, I have been invoked, it'll be interesting to see what the weather's like.

And whilst you're here, here's that video of the Deep Fried Wolfknuckles covering 100,000 Fireflies by the Magnetic Fields that you missed