What the fuck am I supposed to do?

I shocked myself at the weekend.

At Ken Chu's birthday drinking and football watching session at a pub in Finsbury, at some point in the afternoon I found myself sat at a table in the middle of a busy drinking hall, strangers bustling all around. The table housed some of Ken's received gifts, pool cues and cards. There was only me and another friend of Ken's left at the table, other folk had wandered off to the beer garden or headed home.

The other chap mentioned that he wished to leave, so it wold just be up to me to guard the table, to save it for the return of the party, but before he headed home he would seek out the folk in the beer garden.

For a few minutes I was alone, guarding treasure, fending off advances. "Is there anyone sitting here?", "sorry... folk in the beer garden... Cigarettes... Will be back soon..." Sympathetic nods followed by suspicious glares.

The other chap returned and said he was leaving, just as another mob of people looking for seats appeared.

"What the fuck am I supposed to do?" I asked, standing and leaning across at him.

One of the crowd saw me and said it was okay, they were friends of Ken, we'd met an hour or so ago.

I seated myself and looked sheeping.

I felt a little sick, the bubbling bile of rage that prompted me to ask "What the fuck am I supposed to do?" it wasn't a pretty thing, I am a dispicable and cowardly person.

There rest of the afternoon and evening passed without incident.

Anyhoo, today I had another "what the fuck am I supposed to do?" Incident. At my temp job a few people are on holiday, others work in several different offices. There were only two of us in this morning, the guy who knows the job and me. He was called up to go out to the other office, leaving just me.

After a few moments of twiddling my thumbs checking there was no paperwork or filing to do, I got up for a wander and discovered to my terror, that not only was I the only person in the office, I was the only person on site.

"What the fuck am I supposed to do?"

I suppressed the bile and the outrage of being left in such a position this time.

And what I did was this:-
*Planned out a strategy game in perl on paper
*Used my digital camera to shoot a short post-apocalyptic horror movie set in a construction depot and portacabin office complex
*Wrote the narative intro for the aforementioned perl game
*Made a stop-motion animation of the stuff on my desk coming alive and taking over

Not quite what I was supposed to do I guess, but kind of productive.
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