Right, I have a plan, not the best plan perhaps, but a plan with potential for improvement, a plan to get me from the position of having no music career right now, to the position of playing at next year's Indietracks, to a crowd of consensually screaming fans.
Any suggestions, improvements and criticism will be gratefully appreciated...
1. The videos
Record a daily series of videos of me playing guitar and singing at the same time, playing a mix of my own material, indiepop and britpop covers on either electric or acoustic guitar or ukulele. Being joined as time progresses by other instrumentalists who volunteer their services, eventually population a band who shall be known as The Left-Behinds. These videos shall be uploaded onto both Facebook and YouTube.
This daily series shall go on indefinitely.
2. The demos
Once the quality of tune has reached an acceptable level, recordings shall be burnt onto CD and repeatedly sent out to promoters such as Trev Oddbox, Sean Jesus Price, WeePop, Pic n Mixx, Foxes and Convicts and MJ Hibbett, and anyone who shows any interest in the videos. These CDs will be accompanied with cupcakes, cookies, knitted trinkets and fanzinery.
3. The secret gig
Intimate flat-based gigs shall be played in December to a select audience. Tea and scones will be served.
4. The Buffalo
Proper gigs shall be played from January onwards.
5. The session
6Music invite The Left-Behinds in for a session in March. Lauren Laverne raves about the band.
6. The album
Album is recorded in May, and released featuring cover art of a teddy bear on a dusty windowsill.
7. The festival
Play Indietracks to crowd of consensually screaming fans, possibly chanting "Left Behind! Left Behind! Penultimate song in set is a reinvention cover of 'If You Don't Pull', with The Alfreton Male Voice Choir in Lone Ranger masks and opera singer, and Ian Pocketbooks on guest lead guitar, and segue into 'Que Sera Sera'.
8. The aftermath
Declare that the band has disbanded and form a Tallulah Gosh covers band with Enzo Menoni on bass.